The Family Outpost, Episode 1 | Welcome to the Outpost
Most families want to live with purpose, but everyday life can pull them back into survival mode.
In Episode 1 of The Family Outpost, Rance Bland and Kevin Morrison introduce the heart behind the show. Through their own stories, they name the tension many families feel: the desire to build something meaningful while schedules, pressure, conflict, and old patterns keep pulling them back into drift.
Rance shares how early marriage, family brokenness, ministry, Belgium, and the birth of his son helped him rethink what family is for. Kevin shares how God exposed cracks beneath a life that looked strong from the outside and began moving his family toward a bigger vision.
Together, they introduce the question that will shape the season: What would it look like for families to become Kingdom Outposts in everyday life?
Episode Chapters
00:00 Intro and Theme Music
00:36 Meet Rance and Kevin
03:43 Families Done Drifting
04:39 Rance’s Family Story
08:35 The Moment Everything Changed
13:05 Two Visions of Family
14:47 Kevin’s Family Story
21:28 The Kingdom Outpost Framework
22:36 The Outpost Challenge
23:34 Episode 1 Challenge
24:54 Different on Purpose
Outpost Challenge
Sit down with your spouse and finish this sentence out loud:
“Our family would feel more alive if we had more _______ and less _______.”
Do not overthink it. Talk honestly. There is no right answer, only an honest one.
If you are single, reflect on your family of origin.
Rance and Kevin will take this same challenge with their own families and report back in Episode 2.
Share what happened with us at familyoutpost@all4one.org. We read every response.
Episode Transcript
Transcript lightly edited for clarity.
Rance: Most families want to live with purpose, but everyday life just has a way of pulling us back into survival mode.
Kevin: You said the framework of family has to look different. Where'd where did that come from?
Rance: It's not that people don't have good intentions. There's gotta be something more foundational. So many people are experiencing brokenness and fragmentation in family, and I just began to realize that there there has to be something wrong beneath the surface at the level of what we believe family is actually for. Alright.
Rance: Well, I'm Rance Bland, and I'm part of Team Bland. We live in Albuquerque, New Mexico. My wife, Stacy, we've been married twenty years. We have two kids. I have a son, Jaxton, who's 10 and a daughter, Cortlynn, who's seven. And we love sports, the outdoors. Yes. Tacos and green chile because we do live in New Mexico. And I would say we are kind of known as the e-bike family in our neighborhood, Kevin. I I don't know if you've ridden an e-bike, but we've actually got a a bike with two seats on the back. So either me or Stacy drive, and then the kids are in the back in tow. And that's how we take them to school and pick them up. So we're that family, you know, in our neighborhood.
Kevin: I heard somebody say those who can't ride bikes ride e-bikes. Is that
Rance: You know, there might be truth to that because there are some hills in this neighborhood that I would not wanna climb without the the little motor.
Kevin: That's fair.
Rance: Anyway, my my wife is a part-time nurse in the ER. I work for a ministry called All4One, and our mission is to strengthen families through sports and adventure, which is kind of a unique thing that those the tools of sports and adventure, those have been a big part of my life, and I believe they're great tools to strengthen families. And we believe families are a critical part of God's mission. So that's a little bit about our family. Kevin, tell us about Team Morrison.
Kevin: Yeah. So Kevin Morrison of Team Morrison. I've got a beautiful wife, Kelly, who's, the rock of the family. Five kids that usually gets an eyebrow raise from most people. Cason is 10. Colton is seven. Callan is five. Cobe is two. And we have an eight-week-old, Canyon. And, yes, you heard correctly, we are the family that has all C names, which at first, I didn't I wasn't necessarily on board with, but then I got Kelly a really nice necklace with the letter C on it. Apparently, I don't have to get her another necklace. And so I'm a, by day, a PA in orthopedics, and our family has a deck building or outdoor living construction company over the last two and a half years. And so we moved out to the country a couple years ago, which got more eyebrow raises because we are both from right outside of Philadelphia and have no business with 11 acres. That's for sure.
Rance: Awesome, Kevin. And, you know, you you took time today in the midst of your schedule. I think you you've just come come from setting a fractured arm, and here you are making time for this podcast. So that's awesome. Thank you, brother.
Kevin: Of course. Well, I didn't really have a choice because you called me about a month ago, so shortly, maybe six weeks ago, right after Canyon was born. And you said this has to happen, and this has to happen right now even to the point of having to bring all this stuff with me to the office. So why the Family Outpost? Why right now? What's so important that right now in time this has to happen?
Rance: Yeah. Most families want to live with purpose, but everyday life just has a way of pulling us back into survival mode, managing schedules, there's conflict, trying to just get through the week. So this show is for families who are done drifting, families who wanna live on mission in real life, not just, you know, in theory. If you've ever felt like your family was built for something more than you're currently living, this show is for you. Every episode, we're gonna bring you a real story, real family, a framework, and one thing you can actually do with your family this week. So let's get into it, Kevin.
Kevin: Rance, I gotta know because this is this framework, this way of thinking, this approach to the family, this is different in the world we live in today. But when did you or when did, the Bland family start thinking differently about family itself?
Rance: Yeah. So my wife and I got married twenty years ago. It's actually our twentieth anniversary this year. And, honestly, we had no real vision or framework for marriage or family. I mean, we we obviously loved each other. We wanted to honor God and and our relationship and everything we did. But for the most part, if we're really honest, marriage was about us. It was about getting our needs met, having that special person to come home to at the end of a long day. But it was basically a self-centered vision with no real awareness or understanding of building something bigger than us or something that might outlast us. And I think that's probably pretty typical for most newlyweds. But if then if you add to that that my parents got divorced or they finalized their divorce one week before our wedding, you know, the first year or two was really just damage control.
There was a lot of additional drama in our lives. And I've also got three younger siblings, much younger. You know, I was out of the house, graduated from college at that time, but I have a sister who was in high school and I have two brothers who were in middle school. The youngest brother and I, there's a fourteen year age gap. So because of the age difference and everything that our family was going through, Stacy and I were really parenting my siblings or helping to parent my siblings in many ways. And at the same time, I was a youth pastor. And so Stacy and I were also kind of parenting 50 other kids, you know, in the youth group. And many of of them came from pretty broken or traumatized backgrounds. So, you know, we were basically in survival mode for the first six years of of our marriage.
Kevin: I'm trying to, like, actually put myself back in that moment and think of when I got married and all the things. And there are some similarities within our story, but you are starting a a family without great framework, but you're also trying to lead your own siblings. How did how was that?
Rance: It's kinda like the blind leading the blind. We had no idea what we were doing. You know, just trying to help create a safe place for them, as they kind of finished high school. But I think because we were basically surrogate parents for them and for so many others, you know, the impact that that had on us was we really had no desire to have kids of our own. I mean, why would we want kids? It feels like we've already got so many. And and we didn't really have any bandwidth to think about more than that. And there was just zero vision for for for family. But then six years into marriage, God called us to to Belgium. Now I know for those of you who are listening that just came out of left field, but even when Stacy and I got married, that was something God had already put on my heart and I had mentioned to her.
So this calling had been building over the years and the clarity and conviction around it really started to get strong. And we knew God was calling us to leave everything behind and to go. And so, I mean, it truly was a purpose-driven calling. It wasn't a knee-jerk reaction to all the the mess going on in our lives. But in in retrospect, I can see God's timing that he was kind of getting us out of that so that we had the time and space to actually really heal. We we had a lot of hurt and pain and brokenness in ourselves, in our own lives that needed a time of healing and renewal. And so Belgium kind of ended up becoming that that time. And and that's actually when everything changed. Because as we started to heal and and to grow in our marriage, that desire for children really came in strong. And so my son was born in Belgium.
That was the moment when really this realization began to hit me. I've got to tell you, it was a really powerful moment, Kevin. We were at the hospital, and it was a C-section. So the doctor delivered the baby. You know, the nurses take him and and weigh him and clean him up, and they do their thing. Then they hand him to me. And Stacy's still getting sewn up. You know, she just finished the operation. And so here I I have my son, just quality time one-on-one for, like, fifteen minutes. And the thing that that hit me was his eyes were wide open. Now I don't know if that was supposed to be a normal thing that dads know, but, you know, I had seen puppies when they're born. Sometimes they don't have their eyes open. So I wasn't expecting him to just be staring back at me and like, hey, dad. You know? Like, aren't you gonna say something?
And there's just this immediate connection and just this flood of emotion, you know, that that came over me. You know, I know that can be a big moment for for any dad, but it hit me really hard. And I I think some of that was because for so many years, we had been raising other people's kids, and I think that was good and godly. I I hope it made a difference in their lives. But at the end of the day, those kids went home to their own parents or or whatever their home situation was. Maybe it was a grandparent or whoever was raising them. And and now I'm holding my son and realizing he's my responsibility. And, you know, by the grace of God, he's gonna outlive me, and he's gonna have a family of his own one day.
And I just realized I'm I'm gonna have to do some things differently because I don't want him to experience the same pain and brokenness that that we went through and that so many people experience in family. And so as I stood there holding him, I just spoke life and and blessing over him as I stood there in the hospital, and I literally shared the gospel with him. Just told him there's a God who created you, who loves you, who even died for you. And I I told him who he is, tried to speak into his identity, what what his names mean. And it was just this powerful moment that really set me on a journey of trying to make sure I was equipped as a dad and to understand God's design for the family.
Kevin: I mean, I can certainly identify with being in the hospital room and seeing my child for the first time, and we've gone through it quite a few times. My first was very different than that experience, but you're just talking about your your son eyes wide open staring at you, like, now what, dad? Like, tell me everything I need to know about life right in this moment. That's powerful. But for many men, there is this level of responsibility that hits them, this life is gonna look different from here on out. But for you, it was, I've gotta rethink family. Like, I'm not it's not, I've gotta rethink how I'm gonna raise a child because I've never thought about how to raise a son before. You said the framework of family has to look different. Where, like, where did that come from?
Rance: Yeah. Well, I think it's because, it's not that people don't have good intentions. You know? So many families I mean, they they love their family. They wanna see their family succeed. So it's not that the secret is, like, just try harder. You know? Do better. Communicate more. I think there's there's gotta be something more foundational, and and that's what I was seeing. I was I just I didn't know what it was yet, but it's like there has to be more than just trying to do better. There has to be a different way of looking at and thinking about family because the outcomes that many families are getting, and not just my own, but in our culture, are not good. And, you know, the the statistics don't lie. I mean, The U.S. has has some of the highest divorce rates in the world. You know, now a lot of people just aren't even bothering to get married. So marriage rates are down.
Birth rates are down. And the U.S. leads the world in single-parent households. So definitely, despite good intentions, so many people are experiencing brokenness and fragmentation in family. And I just began to realize that there there has to be something wrong beneath the surface at the level of what we believe family is actually for. We can tweak all the little things all all we want, but if we're running on the wrong operating system, we're gonna keep getting the wrong results. As I kind of set out on this journey, I began to realize that there were two pretty distinct visions of a family. And the first one is the one that we're all most familiar with. Maybe we haven't really named it, but it's kind of this springboard vision where the family's a springboard for individual success. And so in this in this vision, you know, you raise your kids, you protect your kids.
And then at age 18, you're launching your kids out into the world, and you're basically saying, alright, buddy, you're flying the nest. I hope you do well. I hope everything I taught you, you know, is gonna stick with you, but you're kind of on your own now. And and as a parent, you're you're kind of like, alright. Job well done. The other vision that maybe is is less common, spoiler alert, I think this is more of the biblical vision, is multigenerational team on mission. Something that has a purpose bigger than any one member of of the team. It's it's about building something that's gonna outlast you. Most of us have inherited that springboard model, and we didn't even realize it. We didn't decide that. It's it's just kind of the default. But this show is is exists to show there is another way. Yeah.
There there is something different, and and that's what we wanna try to uncover in the next few episodes. But without going further in that, Kevin, I'd I'd love to hear more of your story. Let the listeners kinda hear some of your background. When did you realize that there was something missing in your family?
Kevin: Yeah. So that's interesting. And it's probably not this single moment where it all came crashing down on me, kinda like you experienced just holding Jaxton for the first time. I come from a family where kinda origin, both of my parents were married before they ended up leaving their spouses for one another. And the start of our family was a little bit chaotic, a little bit hectic, certainly not walking with the Lord to, in the way that things started. And now by the grace of God, there is so much redemption within that story, but not necessarily the perfect biblical upbringing of how things were supposed to go. And then I meet my wife or my wife to be. I step into their family, and it's like, it's awesome. It just feels like it's perfect. It's, you know, some of the things that I wanted.
And then we're married just over a year, and it feels like out of the blue, the word divorce was brought up. And before you know it, her parents are are split up. And then we moved to North Carolina. And on the outside, everything looked good. And if you would've asked those around us, they would've said, no. They're a good, strong family. At this point where God starts doing this work, we already had three kids. Callan's just a baby. My wife would probably tell you that I'm a good husband, all these things. But as I was reflecting on it, we talk about framework, we talk about foundation, this analogy of seeing cracks in a wall and then taking some spackle and spackling it over and painting it. And then all of a sudden, it looks good, and actually, it even feels good because everything looks better, and it's kinda satisfying the work that you did.
But then all a sudden, cracks show up again, and then you you spackle again, you paint again, things look better. And the realization, the reality is there's something wrong with the foundation. But I had no idea how to fix that and what that even looked like to fix that. And what I found is I was probably chasing my identity and my purpose in the wrong thing. And so I'm I've got a career. I've got a strong patient following, and I start chasing after these other things. Not not things that look bad on the outside. It's real estate. Right? It's another way to generate some income for my family, but I'm I'm I'm chasing things, and they are selfish ambition selfish ambition and vain conceit in in the very end. And I end up going on an XCC in 2017. God opened my heart, my eyes to to see things differently just as a man.
And I start going down this path, and I go on another retreat that was very different. It was just a lot of quiet time with the Lord, and he spoke to me in a radical way and pointed out things and the things that I was chasing in life. And shortly after this, I decided to do this sixty days of discipline. It was more of a spiritual 75 Hard, where it's not like this physical thing. There are some physical components, but it was really a a spiritual thing, a lot of fasting, a lot of prayer. But the purpose and the hope behind it was I was asking God for what is your vision for my life? Over these sixty days, like, I I'm asking what is the vision? Please bring clarity to this vision. If I'm gonna kind of give this one moment where this started happening, it was on day 60.
Because I'm on day 60 of anything like I'm I'm sixty days into this process that was hard, and I am no further along understanding my vision than on day one. Okay. And so I walked downstairs. It's a Sunday. I walked downstairs, and I grabbed my notebook, and I I actually went and found this notebook. I grabbed this notebook, and I grabbed my Bible, I told Kelly, I'm gonna go wrestle with God. And I smiled, but, like, if I'm if I'm being honest, I was frustrated. Mhmm. I was frustrated. Is this the wrong process? Like, I knew God is good, but I was frustrated with not having an answer. I was frustrated, so I told her I'm gonna go wrestle with God. We'll see what happens. And so I go out there, and, he didn't give me an answer. He didn't give me an answer of what his vision is for my life.
He gave me immense clarity that it is not about me, and that I was that I was so focused on my identity and my purpose and me. And I was doing it for the right reasons. I I felt like I was doing it for the right reasons. I wanted to honor God with his vision for my life, but he's made it very clear, like, it's not about you. Like, yeah, I can I can use you, but it's it's something bigger and there's something greater? And there's so many steps after that. I walked away there from there with a destination, but I had no idea how to get there. And I can walk you through so many other moments along the way that brought us here, but what was cool is he set me out on this path, and in the same time, he is setting you and other people around me on the same road. And while I'm trying to figure it out, he's giving you framework. He's giving you language.
He's giving you these these things that he is showing me abstractly in small ways that Kelly and I are picking and choosing. And, I mean, I'm sure we will unpack this as we go through this process. But if there was it started with this destination in front of the pond in my neighborhood, it kinda came together for the Morrison family on an All4One family retreat that I got to be on with Kelly where the language started to come out. The clarity on some of the things that Kelly and I were hearing in prayer and through confirmation started to come together. And that just became a real launching point point for our team in our understanding and actually moving forward, and it's continued to to develop.
Rance: It sounds like, Kevin, you thought you knew the question that needed to be answered. But it's like, God was not interested in answering that question. He he knew the question that needed to be answered and and gave you the answer you you really needed. Would that be a a good way of saying that?
Kevin: Yeah. I would I would absolutely agree and would say it's very much in line with Jacob's interaction with God and the wrestling. And having one question and getting a different answer. And every in the end, everybody walked away a little bit different than when they started. And so I could say the same for not only me, but for the family.
Rance: Yeah. Well, as people are listening to us, you know, share our stories, they're they're hearing us say things about this realization that we had or doing family different or different frameworks. They're probably wondering what what is it? You know, just tell me. Well, that's what this podcast is about. And so the whole operating system question, the springboard versus the team, there is a framework that that we've built around it. And when I say we, not just even you and I, there's a whole team of people that have been a part of that process, but we call it the Kingdom Outpost. Alright? And so in the next several episodes, we're gonna be describing what that is and really drilling down into the details of that. Now I know the name of this podcast is The Family Outpost, so that wasn't a mistake. We'll we'll explain all of that, so just stick with us.
But there's so much more that we could get into. But today was really just about how did we get here? So we'll lay out the framework and and all the details in the next episode, but the framework doesn't really mean anything if you don't understand why why we need it. Right? So but before we go, before we wrap up this episode, I'm really excited about this, Kevin, and this is gonna be a lot of fun. But I wanna introduce our listeners to something that's gonna be part of every episode of this show, and we're calling it the Outpost Challenge. Alright. So here's how it works. Each episode, our guests are going to give Kevin and me a challenge, something that it's going to be really hands on, tangible, something that we can actually do with our families that relates to whatever we've been talking about with with our guests that day.
And then we're gonna ask you, the listener, to do that with us. And then the next episode, Kevin and I will report back, share what happened, what did we experience, what maybe surprised us, what did it surface?
Kevin: This whole show is not meant to be more content. This is this is meant to be lived out together in small action steps and language that builds our family from that Family Outpost into the Kingdom Outpost.
Rance: That's right. And now this is just episode one, so we don't have any guests yet, obviously, which means Kevin and I, for this episode, are giving each other, a challenge, and we'll we'll report back in the next episode about how it went. So here's the challenge. Sit down with your spouse. Or if you're listening and you're single, just be honest with yourself. You could think about your own family of origin experience. But for those of you who are married, sit down with your spouse and finish this sentence out loud. Our family would feel more alive if we had more blank and less blank. Our family would feel more alive if we had more blank and less blank. So don't overthink it. Just just talk about it. Share honestly. You don't have to try to get it right, and we'll do that as well. Right, Kevin?
Kevin: Yeah. I mean, I would say that this part this is the part that I'm both most excited about and most nervous to step into because we have a little bit of control, asking each other some of these questions, but these challenges are gonna come from guests we have later on. We have no idea what we're gonna get ourselves into, but that's the adventure, and that's the exciting part of it. That's right. And so Kelly and I, we have a date night scheduled, tomorrow, and so we will be diving into this. And whatever comes up, comes up.
Rance: Awesome. Yeah. Stacy and I are doing the same, and we'll be sharing exactly what happened. But, you know, as as we close, I think we're at a moment in history where the family is under more pressure than it's ever been. And I think the answer isn't just a program or a conference or read this book. It's a family that decides to be different on purpose. And, you know, part of that is being willing to have some some of these conversations that we're going to be having on this podcast and or or as part of that Outpost challenge. And so I encourage you, have that conversation this week and start this journey with us.
Kevin: Yeah. I think that there's probably gonna be some uncomfortable conversations and things that feel more clunky as you start changing framework, language, foundation, but I would say it's worth it. It's a it's a journey. It's an adventure, and I'm hoping you stick with us. And I also hope that you share some of the responses you get from this challenge and challenges in the future. And we'll make sure we have a link in the show notes so that you can get in touch with us. You can share some of the responses, whether it's funny, whether it was something that you had no idea was on your spouse's significant other's heart. Just whatever it is, we wanna hear as we share with you what's going on in our lives.
Rance: That's right. So in the next episode, Kevin and I will report back on our Outpost Challenge and and what happened as we ask that question with our wives. And then we're gonna lay out this framework that we've been building for a while, this Kingdom Outpost framework. There's four pillars that we believe can completely reorient how a family thinks about what they're for. So it's the foundation for everything the show's gonna do, and, we're looking forward to it. So you're gonna wanna be there for that one.
Kevin: Don't miss it or else.
Rance: Guys, if this conversation meant something to you, please share it. Maybe send it to a couple you know who's asking the same questions. That's how this show grows, and that's how more families will find it. So you can find The Family Outpost on Spotify, Apple Podcast, and wherever you listen. Just search The Family Outpost. And if you're watching on YouTube, subscribe, hit the bell. You know what to do.
Kevin: Alright. See you next time.
Rance: It's been fun, Kevin. Thanks, man.
Kevin: I enjoyed it. Knew it had to happen.
Rance: We're glad you guys are here. See you next time.
Links
The Family Outpost Podcast: https://www.all4one.org/the-family-outpost-podcast
All4One: https://www.all4one.org/
4MUS: https://www.4mus.org/
SportQuest: https://www.sportquest.org/
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